Saturday, July 16, 2011

And now I remember..

Oh finally! I hit my head with reality again that you only consider me as your friend whenever you need something from me especially when it has something to do with money.

I even wonder why I still stay with you and consider you as my friend after all you've done to me, and until now it still hurts me every time I remember what you have told me about a year ago, I can never ever forget when you told me that I should stop declaring that we're close and we're friends cause we're not. 

When you told me that, I really wanted to punch you in your face in front of everyone but I hold back my anger. I hated you so much that time and until now. I think I shouldn't have forgiven you, you're back again to your attitude I really thought you have changed but no you didn't-- you're even worst now. 

I honestly dont know if I should still believe every single word you tell me and every excuses you say. I really dont know who you are now, I dont know now what happened to the person I used to call sister.

I wish one day, you'd realized how much you've hurt me and also I hope you'd realize too that I'm not the bad friend between us, but it was you.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Bored or Depressed?

Wut? Is this like for real? I made 5 posts in one day? There must be something wrong with me and I'm pretty sure of that because I normally write when I'm either depressed or inspired. This time I'm depressed. Oh well at least this got updated. So gotta go til next update! xD

100 FACTS YOU DONT WANNA KNOW ABOUT ME

1.I’m dying to go to Paris.
2.I’ve been hit by a car and my ankle got misaligned.
3.I’m a bag-a-holic I have about 80 bags right now.
4.Certified NBSB.
5.Hopeless romantic.
6.I’m scared of being involved to relationships but I also want to  have a boyfriend.
7.I was born with Hirschsprung's disease ( go google it).
8.I have three stitches on my tummy.
9.I’m right handed but don’t know how to use fork with my right hand.
10.I have a 200-250 vision and 50 astigmatism.
11.I’m scared of rats.
12.I’m scared of blood.
13.I’m scared of heights.
14.I’m scared of bridges.
15.I talk a lot.
16.I’m hyperactive.
17.I’m a cry baby, I easily cry over scenes I watch or things being said to me.
18.I hate pink, I find it overrated.
19.I always paint my nails.
20.My shoe size is 9.
21.I love movies and I ran a movie review blog.
22.I love the smell of pentel pens.
23.I love reggae and bosa.
24.I’m always a part of Art Club but never learned how to draw.
25.I hate silence, it kills me.
26.I’m a bitch. In a good way.
27.I’m sarcastic.
28.My real name is Frances Rita, but please call me Frances
29.I literally talk to myself.
30.I only have on sibling, elder brother we rarely talk to each other but we fight almost everyday.
31.I stopped eating junk foods since I vomited blood.
32.I used to be so embarrassed of my size but when I met Amber Riley and her character Mercedes, I became comfortable with it and realized that being a plus-sized is something I shouldn’t be shy of.
33.I easily fall for sweet guys.
34.I’m sweet and love to show my care to other people.
35.I have a lot of frustrations.
36.As a kid my dream job was to become a supermodel.
37.I could always stand a fight for my friends.
38.I’m an over protected friend
39.I don’t get mad easily but once I lost my temper I throw the nearest thing to me to the person I hate. (I’m a bit violent when I get mad).
40.I don’t make promises that I can’t make it come true, And I also don't believe with it.
41.I love non-sense conversations it makes me think.
42.I love eating at Mcdo.
43.I love Mexican, Italian and Filipino foods.
44.Procrastination is one of my hobbies.
45.I'm super moody; sort of bipolar.
46.I get attracted to geek/ nerdy guys, I find it sexy whenever they stutter.
47.When I don't talk my friends worry alot and thinks there's something wrong with me.
48.Yes a childish.
49.I easily laugh even on the silliest joke
50.I love to hug my friends.
51.I dont normally send text messages or make a phone call,so when I text you like hours it means you're really especially to me.
52.I care for others more than I should care for myself.
53.I cant watch a on a movie house alone..
54.I can’t sleep without a blanket even if it’s too hot.
55.You can easily get along with me.
56.I talk really fast.
57.When I was in college, I belong to the mean girls group.
58.I learned how to swim when I was a junior in college.
59.My favorite number is 19 because: I was born on the 9th month on the nineteenth day and at 1 am so everything sums it up.
60.I love blueberry cheesecake.
61.I always cry whenever I watch My Sassy Girl and A Walk to Remember.
62.Whenever I get depressed I only eat ice cream and nothing else.
63.I love inventing my own terms and calling names to my friends.
64.I’m an occasional blogger.
65.I have a weird family tree, I have a relative who is my aunt on the father side and cousin on my mother side.
66.I could spend entire day in front of my laptop.
67.I always have colds due to my  rhinitis.
68.I’m allergic with shrimps.
69.I don’t know how to use can openers I always end up getting hurt.
70.I have an eye for fashion, but I don’t follow it.
71.I can be easily pleased.
72.I appreciate even the simplest thing said or given to me.
73.Sort of gullible.
74.A dork.
75.Queen of Klutz.
76.I never pass my math.
77.I love surprises but I no one surprised me yet.
78.I love to plan for birthday parties for my friends.
79.I used to have braces—on my back after I fell off from the stairs when I was a kid.
80.My favorite color is purple and brown.
81.I’m scared of clowns.
82.You can always count on me.
83.I can proudly say that you're lucky to have me as a friend because in a way I'm martyr, I could stay with you as long as you want me to, though you've done a lot of bad things to me.
84.Guys gets intimidated with me ‘coz according to them I’m too smart.
85.When a guy I like likes my friend I always give way.
86.I still want to be serenaded.
87.I still want to receive a love letter.
88.I cant sleep without having my headset on.
89.I am nervous if I cant stop biting my nails.
90.I’m a huge music fan and a TV series addict.
91.I once wallowed a class mate on a drum of water.
92.I’m ill-tempered and mean.
93.My guy friends calls me boss.
94.No matter how busy I am or no matter how tired I am, I always find time to go on tumblr not just to reblog but to talk with my followers friends.
95.I’m compassionate.
96.I go overboard reading signals.
97.I’m paranoid.
98.I hate people who acts like they know everything.
99.I’m working as an SEO Specialist in an Online Marketing Company.
100.I’m straight.

More about me:

I am loving, compassionate, and ruled by my feelings. I am able to be a foundation for other people but I still know how to have fun. Sometimes my emotions weigh me down, but I generally feel free from them. I am wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. I am always up to something. I have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle me. I'm very intense. I'm definitely are a handful, and I'm likely to get in trouble. But my kind of trouble is a lot of fun. I am usually the best at everything,I strive for perfection. I'm confident, authoritative, and aggressive. I am very intuitive and wise. I understand the world better than most people. I also have a very active imagination. I often get carried away with my thoughts.I am prone to a little paranoia. I sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals. I am very open. I can communicate well, and I connect with other people easily. Im a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from my mind. I am very adaptable. I am friendly, charming, and warm.

What Happen to that Bookworm Frances?

D'oh! I already forgot the last time I read a book and the last book I've ever read. Like what happened to me was this all because of my addiction with internet? Well I cant blame any one from this, I mean internet is my comfort zone now, it makes me feel so happy being online.

But still I miss reading books-it was my life before. Like I can spend days reading a book but not anymore now, hopefully I can still find time and be able to find a book.

And oh in fact, I used to be a loner and people call me geek but what they never know is that I'm not totally a geek I just love book

I wanna bring back my addiction with books same as my addiction with internet, someday I know it'll happen. :)

Where are you my Prince Charming?


I could still remember this post but nothing happened yet its already mid-year and I'm about to turn a year older again but still I'm single, what's wrong? *pouts*-- I sounded like a desperate girl haha. :p

But yes, seriously I really wanna fall in love someday--or not someday but one of this days. Like have someone to hold my hand and to make me feel so especial and a guy who'd never get tired of saying I love you to me--a guy who would always be proud of having me as his girlfriend.

People would always tell me: Just wait, it'll come in the right time and in the right place"--what if that right time comes when I'm already old, I don't ever want that to happen I don't wanna die virgin! 

Some people would also tell me to re-asses myself, with what I really like into a relationship some would also tell me to undergo diet.--Diet really? Well most people gets attracted psychically  but not at all with me, I mean I wan't someone to love me even though I'm a plus sized. Someone like Puck from the series Glee,he was never afraid to fall in love with Mercedes and Lauren, both plus sized character. But in real life, I wonder where that guy is now?

Or maybe, I need to put down the feeling of being afraid of falling in love. Yes I'm scared of it-- I'm scared of being hurt, being betrayed and being scared of handling a relationship because I've never been to it, but I honestly want to be in it--be in a relationship and have a boyfriend.

It makes me sad and feel so alone, like right now I dont even have a fling and nobody's dating me too. I envy people who are with their special someone. I just really want to be in love but how and when. 

And until when, until when should i wait for love to struck me, where are you my prince charming? 






Long Distance Friendship

I have never imagined that I'll find a real friend online. Yeah, this sounded a bit creepy for some but its actually not-- its so much fun! It's much fun than having a real life friends. Well let me explain how our wonderful friendship begun.

I've been using tumblr for almost a year now and my tumblr account is not like the usual, what I mean by this is its where I show how much I fan girl towards a celebrity or a show where no one tell me to calm down, and its like living in a different life, away from reality, work, stress, pain and hatred and so on.

At around the month of March of this year I got a new follower, a gleek like me. I really got curious with her like I had the itchiness of talking to her. Then I followed her back and do the usual thing I do when I gain a follower-- go to their ask box and thank them. 

When I went to her blog, I couldnt find her ask box and I was like: "how can I thank her, how can I befriend her?" *sigh*. I waited for couple of days or maybe weeks hoping she'll change her theme. But nothing happens, so then I decided to post something on my own tumblr saying: "@imquinnfabray am I the only one who can't find your ask box or you really don't have one? please reply to this post if you see this." An hour after posting that, nothing happened.

Then came March 31st, I intentionally went to her blog again. Hoping and wishing she changes her theme, a theme with an askbox and alas! there it goes, there goes her ask box. And I'm not gonna lie I was really happy like a kid when I saw it like giddy happy! 

At first, I was kinda hesitant to send her a message thinking what if she ignores and doesnt answer my message? But whatever-- I still did, I still sent her a message. I waited for a couple of minutes for her to answer then she did!

And it was like almost everyday we talk to each other and its really fun. In fact, I can no longer stand a day without talking to her, it's like she's part of my daily routine and I really get moody whenever we dont talk'

I honestly never did imagined we'd be this close-best friends online, where in fact I dont normally stick to someone from internet-- especially now, now with our situation she's from Florida and I'm from Philippines. But I did, I did sticked to it. And there's nothing to regret about this friendship.

Months have past (3months to be exact) and we still have our friendship, and I could say its getting stronger each day. And to be honest, I'm way happier with the friendship we have rather than my real life friends, I mean I can be open to her I can tell her things I can't tell my friends.

I can fan girl with her and I can be pervert to her without thinking of how she will react because we're the same. In other words, I can show her my other crazy side without limitations, no need to pretend or whatsoever, we can be as uhhsome and uhhmazing the way we wanted to be and let people be jealous of us!

She's a total blessing to me, a person who give's me total happiness a real friend more than those friends I have in real life, we consider each other as "wifeys" and she makes my life a little less tiring just by talking to her, and I love how we simply understand each other but there's only one thing I dont like, we live in different countries.

Yes I have to admit there are alot of times the I hope she's right here next to me or she lives right across the 
street but no we're ten-thousand miles apart, there are times that we just wanted to hug each other but we can't because of this stupid distance, how I wish I can move Philippines to Florida or vice verse. 

But, I'm not gonna lose hope because I know in the right time and in the right place God will allow us to meet, God is in our friendship and I think anything is possible-- and I would love to look forward someday of meeting her, and I think I should also save money so I can visit her country or whatever. I really wish it would happen.

It's funny though that sometimes, I imagine how it's gonna be when we met, would we ever talk to each other right away without having the feeling of being shy and unease, would we ever joke to each other the way we fool around in our conversations on MSN? I really do hope so. ;)

This is a friendship I would forever treasure. A friendship I will take with me on my grave.

So, Alice-- you'd always be my "wifey", little sister.-- I love you.